Monday, November 21, 2011

FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT

In the words of my "brother" to describe the male sex drive in terms of their LACK of desire for forplay, WHY, and nutting early. Hahahahahahahaha

"It's like with dogs. If you give them a treat right away they're going to nibble at it, but if you tease them for a while they're gonna just chomp it all up at once and it's gone!"

It finally makes sense.
This is amazing info for the ForRealBitch :)

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Parenting Sucks

So it has just occured to me, under the influence of good weed:

That parenting sucks.
And a lot of things suddenly make sense to me about who I am and why I came to be this way.
My mother's crazy, okay? Absolutely beyond psycho crazy insane. Huge temper problems - that slowly developed more and more gradually for my dad over the course of their marriage, and 5 years behind (started to get into the fighting with them when I was about 5), it gradually developed more and more for me. I'll always be about 5 years behind her temper span.
Anyways, she's a control freak. To the ultimate extreme. She thinks she is right about absolutely everything, and so she tells everyone what to do. But the problem with the 3 people in our oh so lonely family is that me and dad also think we're right most of the time, too. We just don't try to control everyone and everything because of it. Naturally, we don't listen to her. Or we do and we do it our way (still a problem in her eyes). Over time, the voice raises slightly a tenth of a knotch more and the anger builds up in time, in time. And then she's like a volcano, and always active.
I honestly wish I could be like most college freshman and live at home. But it has gotten so bad at the homefront I left as soon as I could. In fact, I hadn't even graduated yet. Freshly 18, on my own. Living with 5 other lesbians about 45 minutes from my highschool in a 3 bedroom apartment, which I co-co-owned the lease. Coming back home around graduation was probably the worst time for me, because my girlfriend (no family) had to come live with us and they did not like her - they just felt really bad for her and they didn't want me to fuck up graduation by helping her find a place to live. The 6 females had too much PMS and depression to make things last more than a few months obviously. But we loved each other and called each other family. And after me and my ex broke up, 4 of us stayed talking and wanting to move in together. Panama City we went (480 miles from small-town Southeastern Louisiana). And 2 of us decided to come back because we were pulling all the weight. Finally found out how to grow up and couldn't do it because we didn't have the right people with us. Great people in your lives arn't always the best to live with - lesson learned. We all still keep in touch from time to time.
The girl came live with me at my parent's house, again, and I was just ready to get out. The promise of coming home and using my scholarship money meant a payed-for apartment and a new car. Both came true in time - they kept their promise. It just meant me and her had to live their for a month and a half. It got bad again, but I wasn't home a lot because I was bringing her to work, going to school full-time, and working full-time (the most productive I've felt in a while). It was better, though, because they had realized they were losing me forever having their 18 year old daughter move 4 states away. And things are ever-increasingly getting better. I'm living about 5 minutes away in my own 1 bedroom apartment that me and my boyfriend share. It's nice - updated, feels suburban, but it's small. Anyways, the beginning of the semester involved my dad sitting in the kitchen every day as all my guy friends waiting nervously on the couches. It looks horrible to a father, but I hang out with 75% guys, and I have a shitload of friends. They come smoke weed at night and they fall asleep on the couch. I go sleep alone on my air mattress because we're always too busy to go mattress shopping with my parents. This was before my boyfriend moved in - and he actually made them trust me more. What parent, even, would let a 16 year old (turned 17 a week after he moved in) move in with an 18 year old and get him emancipated, when they're about to move 3 states away??? Well, my boyfriend's parents actually. It's crazy. And our parents just trust us right now. Things just feel right in our lives - we know everything's about to go down the right path - we're just nervous about it.
And slowly the temper with my mom is winding down towards me - and them as well because
of the relieved stress of me being out the house again.
Things are getting better, slowly but surely.
At least we're REAL about it :)

<3ForReal Bitch<3

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

We're All Attracted To Different Things

Here's what's attractive to meA forreal bisexual, that is:




Big boobs with a small waist (contrast is good)








The sexy librarian look
Intelligence is attractive
And sexy.






Orange sweatpants, they stand out








Hair half-up
I don't care what anyone says; this is the most
attractive way to way your hair








Showing your shoulders
Shoulders are sexy









LONG hair










Flat stomach
Healthy is sexy






Neon colored tights






White moccassin flats







Nerd glasses on mixed girls
They look best on mixed girls okay?







Shit like this








Pink highlights on blonde hair
And I totally want my hair just like this!!









Pigtails
Mainly on myself









Capri sweatpants










Hair this color!!!










Girly leather jackets






Green eyes (Isn't this girl gorgeous???)

Sunday, October 30, 2011

AboveTheInfluence.com in a Nutshell


Alcohol
Alcohol actually blocks some of the messages trying to get to the brain. This alters a person's perceptions, emotions, movement, vision, and hearing

They claim with sources:
My comments are in pinkish purple, woo!

- In 2006, more than 19% of drivers ages 16 to 20 who died in motor vehicle crashes had been drinking alcohol.
(That's 1 in 5)

- More than 4 in 10 people who begin drinking before age 15 eventually become alcoholics.
Damn, that's a lot.

- Some medications — including many painkillers and cough, cold, and allergy remedies�contains more than one ingredient that can react with alcohol.
Something to think about for all you hardcore partiers

- Mixing alcohol and cocaine is the most common cause of drug-combination related deaths.
Though its likely you're really depressed and suicidal for attempting the combination period

Ecstasy
- Some problems can occur while or soon after taking the drug, others come days or weeks after taking Ecstasy.
I've actually had this happen to me

Hallucenogens
Risks:
- Disturbing psychological effects
- Loss of muscular coordination

LSD users can also experience flashbacks, which are when the original drug's effects suddenly reoccur up to a year after the initial use. Because flashbacks can occur without warning, they can cause significant distress or impairment, especially if this occurs in an uncomfortable or dangerous setting such as at work, school, or while driving.
Pretty crazy. But I'm sorry that sounds totally cool

Some LSD users experience severe, terrifying thoughts and feelings of despair, fear of losing control, or fear of insanity and death while using LSD.
I've heard this is very much true. Never know what could happen

PCP is addictive — its repeated abuse can lead to craving and compulsive PCP-seeking behavior, despite severe adverse consequences
Bias wording, but true

Mary Jane, Baby
Additionally, there are higher rates of depression, anxiety, and suicidal thinking among people who use marijuana when compared to people who don't use
That's because we know more about the world, and it's kinda depressing

The short-term effects of marijuana can include problems with memory and learning.
Biggest problem, honestly. But we learn about DIFFERENT things

Prescription Drugs
These medications, when taken inappropriately, can cause addiction because they impact the same areas of the brain as heroin
Something to think about, since pain pills are getting so popular

Smoking puts your friends and family at risk. Each year approximately 3,000 non-smokers die of lung cancer from second-hand smoke.
Are we being selfish? Or is this mainly a problem with people that smoke around their kids?

They seem to say that cigarettes contribute to other drug abuses ?

Analysis:
Some pretty good facts. None of what we haven't heard before.

<3ForrealBitch<3

Saturday, October 29, 2011

What a ForReal Bitch can learn from the 2011 Maxim Hot 100

#1 Rosie Hutington-Whitely
It's official. All you need to be the hottest woman in the world...
Take over a role that originally belonged to Megan Fox


Transformers knew they had nothing else going for them.
They had to replace the role well

#2 Olivia Munn
This is proof we don't know what men want
How did she place over Jessica Alba?!



3 Katy Perry
Guys will always love big blue eyes, and things shooting out of your boobs
Even if you can't sing


Blue hair always helps too


#4 Cameron Diaz
Good to know we can still be hot good into our 30s


But she was fine as FUCK when she was younger


#5 Mila Kunis
To you rare breed of women with 2 different eye colors. Rejoice, Mila Kunis is the hottest woman in the world in my book.


She's beyond hot okay?!

#6 Bar Refaeli
Top 10 women can be seen in lingerie. Did you really think any different?



#7 Anne Hathaway
Her royal relatives from Genovia got people to make her hot.
Don't worry, it could happen to anyone



#13 Kaley Cuoco
Even the nerds want blonde hair and blue eyes.
WTF is wrong with this world?!


Or maybe average guys watch the Big Bang Theory in hopes that they'll learn something

#14 Scarlett Johansson
She has the best curves in the world. Curves = Top 15



#17 Megan Fox
She's a completely fake completely sexy vixen. Naturally, men would die for her



#18 Eva Mendes
She makes the mole hot. What can we say?



#19 Anna Kournikova
We can be safely assured now that our interest in tennis is quite hot.



#20 Taylor Swift
Sing pretty little country songs to men, and they will worship you.


#21 Jessica Alba
We all know she should probably be #1, and we all know our men want her badly.
She totally can't act though



#22 Rihanna
Being a bad girl and a wannabe Lady Gaga can get you into the Top 25, if you're hot as fuck and you can sing (even if your songs suck).
Red hair definitely, definitely works on her though. Have you seen the All The Lights video??



#24 Sarah Shahi
We know you like girl on girl action
But seriously, you watch the L Word??



#25 Britney Spears
Let's face the facts. We will never know why guys find Britney Spears attractive



#27 Michelle Tratchenberg
Guys love Robot Chicken
And you should totally watch it
Because it's totally awesome



28 Lea Michelle
Guys watch Glee???
Yay, there's more nerds in this world than we thought!



#29 Sofia Vergara
Women with accents, newsflash: Guys love it!!!



#30 Amanda Bynes
We knew it.
We knew our guy friends were fantasizing over her when we were kids watching All That
This is our proof!



#31 Evan Rachel Wood
It's totally okay to be with weird guys... If you're as hot as Evan Rachel Wood



#32 Emmy Rossum
Singing opera gives you bonus points



34 Avril Lavigne
Hot Topic is Hot























#35 Kim Kardashian
It's okay - heiresses have more money to put into their hotness



#37 Zoe Saldana
Avatar yourself. If you're hot, you're probably hot























#38 Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay is proof that guys and girls definitely find different things attractive























We think she's nasty; they think she's hot. Go figure

#40 Hilary Duff
The cute girls always grow up to be the hot ones























#42 Emma Stone
You NEED to learn how to do your top liner like Emma























#48 Julianna Hough
If you're beautiful AND you're a famous dancer, you're bound to be everyone's dream girl!























#53 Ashley Greene
Sorry to say it because she's definitely gorgeous, but the vampire characters on Twilight are hottest with those hungry eyes























#54 Vanessa Hudgens
Bitches, be warned. This is the only reason guys want to watch High School Musical with you.
(No it's not Ashley Tisdale because she's not on the list, duh.)























But why do YOU want to watch High School Musical? O.o
Bisexuals.

#55 Joanna Krupa
You should totally send your man a photo like this


















He WILL thank you

#56 Christina Hendricks
Bitches, red hair is HOT























Be brave and go red!

#57 Audrina Patridge
How to be as hot as Audrina:
1. Smile big
2. Look up at the sky when a camera flashes
3. Be in a sucky reality TV show























What the hell is she always looking at?!

#58 Christina Aguilera
Some people do have it all























If you're not jealous of her you're crazy

#60 Kelly Brook
As long as you're hot, playing in shitty movies can steal get you noticed by Playboy























But it's still hard to be as hot as Kelly Brook

#61 Eva Amurri
If your mom was once a major hottie,
You're in luck!






















No seriously, did Susan Sarandon get work done?!

#64 Miley Cyrus
Even the untalented are hot























#66 Aly Michalka
Alyson Michalka is the reason we should not forget about our former Disney stars.
God she's so hot!























#68 Anna Paquin
Your cute little tooth gap could wind you #68 on Maxim's Hot 100 List
Or maybe it's only hot because she plays on a Vampire series - who knows.























#75 Nicki Minaj
What do Nicki Minaj and Barbie have in common?
Their proportions arn't realistic.
Plastic is a girl's best friend?























We're still jealous of your butt anyways

#77 Anna Chapman
Be an American traitor
It's hot























Men are horrible

#83 Carly Craig
Sometimes matching your hair and your eyes works.
Bitches with chesnut eyes, rock it!























#84 Paz de la Huerta
If this girl's on the Hot 100 list...
You can be too

















Sorry Paz, you're just not very kissable to me.

#85 Rachelle Leah
We should get our lingerie inspirations from the UFC















This is HOT

#87 Emmanuelle Vaugier
Hollywood photoshoots do major wonders.









































So don't be jealous of the unrealistic

#95 Serinda Swan
The girl you NEED to be getting your workout routine from






















#96 Sophie Monk
How bad could plastic surgery be?
Apparently you don't know who Sophie Monk is.
Honorary ChipMonk of the year: (the name says it all)






















(At least she's admitted to her terrible work)
#97 Hope Dworaczyk
When your ass is this big, people just can't help but not look away















Can't look away, can you?

#98 Camilla Belle
Yes, your eyebrows can be too thick...